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It's the 'hands on' stuff that bothers me!'
Speech from the throne.'
[Artificial insemination has become an uncontroversial commercial transaction.]
Enjoy them while you can!'
'Geez...isn't it bad enough the city is dingin' me for another 15% to park downtown! You're as bad as the city!' 'Shut up! This is how I pay for my parking!!''
Thanks to Graham James, a new kind of bogeyman...'
Alberta budget surplus is over $2 billion, thanks to surging oil prices...'
New Environment Minister would make damaging wildlife habitat a criminal offense...'Says he was only answering the call of nature. Besides, he says, a seagull did the same thing to his car last week.'
So that's the plan. If they're going to invade our space, we'll invade theirs! Questions?' 'Can we make a mess, crank up the music, and roar around on those crazy machines?!'�
Ah, you have a passport...that'll make things easier!'
Watch him...he'll lull ya with his nice guy thing, and then...wham! Before you know it, he's bored you to death!'
Canada Pension Plan...'It's not broken...it just needs some T.L.C.!!''
Briar's over and the Flames are home...'How come the ice is so narrow? Hey...where's the net?' 'Dude, check out this fat puck with a handle!''
Raul, do you hear me? It is time for you to take over.'
'We hope people will come to realize that we have to protect the young salmon.' - Prime Minister Chretien.'
[Calgary Flames trade Theoren Fleury.]
Okay...now where was I?'
'We want to be stinkin' rich oil barons like Alberta, but we don't want to give up the handouts! What's wrong with that?' 'Nothin' I can see.''
'They say Canada needs a new spy agency.' 'Really? I thought that's what the census was all about.''
'So tell us, Monsieur Bouchard, should Quebec ever separate from Canada, what kind of future can Quebec's Inuit expect?' 'Security? Some kind of hairy beasts have wandered into my office!''
Do you two desperados take each other in unholy matrimony?'
Expansion Stampede...'Well! Will you look at that! Our parking problems have been solved! Where did it come from?' 'Been there all along. It's Saskatchewan!''
One of the things that comes with being stinking rich is that you become paranoid about not being stinking rich. So we're not sharing!!'
News item - Quebec demands $1.9 billion from Ottawa as compensation for merging GST with Quebec sales tax...'
[Prime minister Jean Chretien thinks about the membership of the federal Cabinet.]
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